Sometimes in parenthood we find support in different places to where we expect. This piece is about learning that without a built-in village of support, our support is grown gradually and often comes from a variety of places.
Sometimes small or ordinary kindnesses become the moments that stick with us the most. When you don’t have support around you in parenthood, kindness from others even in passing can feel like a lifeline, reminding us that we are seen and not entirely alone.
Without a village, physical spaces can begin to feel extra significant and emotional in parenthood. The hallway where you paced with your baby at night, the kitchen table covered in art and snacks, the bedroom filled with bedtime stories and quietly sung songs. A lot happens in these places. Sometimes, when we didn’t have people to hold us, these places did.
Without a village, making decisions all the time can feel relentless. From everyday choices about meals and routines to bigger decisions about your children’s development and wellbeing, the mental load is never really put down. When there are fewer people share responsibility, offer perspective, or help with decisions, it makes sense to experience mental exhaustion and overwhelm. This week’s journal explores decision fatigue in the context of parenting without a village.
Without a village, anxiety in parenthood can feel less tied to specific moments and more a part of every day life. When one or two people are holding everything on their own, there is less room for things to go wrong, and that can lead to parents feeling like they never really “switch off”. This piece explores the anxiety that can come with raising little humans without a wider support system and how different and sometimes chronic it can be.
Making and maintaining friendships in adulthood can feel difficult for anyone, but parenting without a village adds layers that often go unseen. This piece explores the emotional and practical challenges of building connection while carrying the full weight of caregiving, and the quiet loneliness of trying to create support from scratch.
When emergencies happen in parenthood, everything suddenly shifts into survival mode. And without a village, all of the worry, planning, decision-making, and emotional weight falls onto one or two people. This piece explores the hidden heaviness of navigating urgent moments without wider support, and the quiet ways we learn to steady ourselves through them.
Motherhood can feel lonely, even when you’re never physically alone. Without a village, the absence of adult connection can feel louder, heavier, and harder to hold in the everyday moments, even on the fullest of days.
When you are parenting without a village, rest isn’t a given – it’s something you have to create. This piece explores the quiet guilt of needing space, and why it makes so much sense.
Without a village, support doesn’t feel like something that is simply there.
It can feel like something you have to ask for, something to justify.
And when it has never felt built in, asking can feel heavier than carrying everything yourself.
